January 16, 2006
Doctor Poo (Mouth)
If you also think that the funniest bits in Little Britain are Tom Baker's voice-overs, then listen to this - seven minutes of expletive-splattered out-takes by the man himself. He attempts to record a commercial, but instead wrestles with the inanity of a bad script and the finer points of English pronounciation (and ironically, it's the company he's voicing the avert for that end up sounding like total bozos.)
November 10, 2005
Possibly the most powerful energy drink ever
For someone who is extremely caffeine-intolerant (two cans of Diet Coke and I'm a wreck), the mere existence of VPX Redline Fat Burner gives me palpitations. This is what it can do to you:
"I tried Redline today while heading to work. I am a huge fan of RedBull & Diet Rockstar. I am 33 years old & in excellent condition.
Having not read the warning label I drank the whole bottle within 5 minutes. Within 10 minutes I was blacking out behind the wheel & shaking uncontrollably. I pulled over at a gas station - I was having difficulty in swallowing and could not stand, breathe or see straight.
I could not even walk for the convulsions. A bystander called the paramedics. Needless to say - my blood pressure was sky high & I thought I was on my way out.
I feel this drink is extremely dangerous & should not be on the market. There needs to be a very visible warning label not to drink the whole bottle for beginners. It has been 5 hours now & I still do not feel normal."
August 26, 2005
Chomsky with dick jokes
It's impossible to tire of these quotes. Two favourites:
"I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I recommend you look around the world in which we live...and shut your fucking mouth."
"Today, a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration. That we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively. There is no such thing as death, life is only a dream and we're the imagination of ourselves. Here's Tom with the weather."
Thanks Toby.
August 14, 2005
Edinburgh Fringe
Went to Edinburgh this weekend, and sampled a few 'Fringe benefits' (do you see what I did there?) Stewart Lee was pretty good and Richard Herring's new show 'Someone Likes Yoghurt' was genius. He even singled out Bronwyn for special attention ("the girl in turquoise looking bored.") But the real find was Alan Carr - camp and gossipy but also sharp and self-deprecating (best joke: "I parked in the disabled space outside Tescos. The attendant said 'what's your disability?' I said 'Tourette's. Fuck off.'"